Review: Beliebers Be Crazy, by j

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He’s 17, from Stratford and one of the biggest pop stars today.  Justin Bieber has never really fascinated me.  When I would think of Justin Bieber I would conjure up images of Aaron Carter.  I thought he was a cute kid, but once the voice changes the 5 year old fans would graduate to Justin Timberlake or Katy Perry.  I truly did not get the hype – heard one song, that stupid ‘Baby’ song.  I wasn’t really aware of any other songs.  How wrong I truly was.

Wednesday afternoon I got a call from A.

A: Soooo.  You want to go see Never Say Never with me tonight at 6:30?

J: No.

A: OK.

J: (feeling guilty) Well, maybe…

A: MEET ME THERE. *click*

For those of you that don’t know, the Beibs (as the kids call him) is so famous that they made a movie out of his tour.  The film is half bio pic (what 16 year old gets a flippin’ bio pic?!) and half concert film.  I’m not really a concert film kind of person, makes me wish I was at the concert.

The film was interesting (to me anyways) since about a third of it was shot in either Stratford (the Biebs’ hometown) and London, where most of the concert moments were filmed.  There were a lot of moments that I said to myself “Hey.  I know that place.”  Pretty cool, considering this movie is the highest grossing concert film EVA.

There were some moments that made me say “aw”.  They are the following:

1.     Biebs sings “Baby” with a cutie at an acoustic session. The little girl is pretty cute.

2.    Seeing the little town of Stratford and the JLC in the film

3.     Home video of the Biebs as a toddler, he was pretty cute

4.     The concert effects were pretty massive, looks like it was a good show

5.     Boys II Men.  LOVE.

And like many things, there were lots of things that irritated me.  Here are the highlights:

1.     Home videos of the Biebs as a baby.  Some things should stay sacred, right?  He was super cute, but home videos are super private. If those are shared with the world, what do you keep private?

2.    The song “One Less Lonely Girl”.  EFF YOU BEIBER MACHINE.  The lyrics to the song were slightly offensive. Being lonely is bad. Wrong. Scary.  Don’t be alone, and if you are, couple up.  NOW.

3.     Scooter Braun, the Biebs’ manager.  Seriously?  Scooter?  Who named you?  Are you 12 years old?  You irritate me.

4.     Jayden Smith. That kid is annoying, but will only grow up to be a self-entitled jerk.  Someone please start treating him like a kid, and not a rap superstar (include the Biebs on this one).

5.     Dead beat dad.  They spoke a lot about the Beibs’ mom, being a single mom (though no mention of the teen part).  They even had the Beibs’ dad tearing up watching him perform.

6.     Screaming girls.  The big bad Beiber machine (orchestrated by adults) created this frenzy of screaming girls who are portrayed as empty headed, silly and insane.  Made me angry.

7.     The hair.

8.     Mama Jan, the vocal coach who said to the Biebs after a screaming bout lead to vocal trouble: Do you want to do this or do you want to move back to Canada?  Whoa.  Back off.

9.     Umm, Usher?  Just an FYI; the Beibs is not part of your “legacy”.  You have never achieved his level of fame.  Stop thinking you “paved the way”.  I just feel sad for you.

10.  Mama “Anti-Semite” Biebs.  After a quick Internet search I found a quote from Justin’s mom saying that she didn’t want Scooter to be Justin’s manager at first.  Why?  Because he’s Jewish.  “God, I gave him to you. You could send me a Christian man, a Christian label! … you don’t want this Jewish kid to be Justin’s man, do you?”

And finally, can someone please give this message to Justin Bieber and his “team”?

JUSTIN BIEBER DID NOT WORK HARD.  HE DID NOT “ACCOMPLISH” ANYTHING (EXCEPT MAYBE HIS HAIR, AND SOME GREAT DANCE MOVES).  ADULTS DID. ADULTS WHO ARE PROFITTING OFF OF A TEENAGER.  JUSTIN BIEBER IS TALENTED.  SO ARE A LOT OF PEOPLE. HE IS NOT BLESSED. HE’S EFFING LUCKY.

At the end of the day, the Biebs gets my sympathy.  He’s on top, and there is (truly) nowhere to go but down.  The crash may be hard; I hope he survives the inevitable.  It might be a bit less of an impact if those adults stopped with the inflation of the teenage ego, and ensured that the Beibs is grounded and present throughout the exploitation.

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About weywardsisters

The Three Weyward Sisters first appeared in Shakespeare’s “Macbeth”. It turns out we have more in common with these “weird” sisters than we thought. In the Shakespeare play the sisters represent darkness, chaos and conflict. We’ll leave it up to you to decide which of us represents each. They also usually show up to mark impending doom. Well, we certainly hope that our presence on this little corner of the Interwebs doesn’t mean impending doom for anyone. However, we find our commonalities with the witches in other ways. To be weyward means to be willful, disobedient and to turn away from what is “right or proper”. Those who know us would whole heartedly agree – we are three weyward sisters. We are three headstrong, stubborn (some more than others), obstinate and willful sisters. Read at your own risk.

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